What a Good Performance Appraisal Should Look Like
No Surprises, Just Clarity, Care, and Growth
Let’s be honest: most people don’t look forward to performance appraisals. Managers feel awkward. Team members worry about what’s coming. And often, both sides leave the meeting feeling a bit flat, confused, or frustrated.
But it doesn’t have to be like that.
A truly good performance appraisal is built on one golden rule:
No surprises.
Not for the person receiving feedback. Not for the manager giving it. Just a calm, open, and honest conversation rooted in mutual trust. If something comes up in an appraisal that hasn’t been mentioned before, that’s a failure of management, not performance.
When handled well, an appraisal becomes something else entirely. A moment to pause. To reflect on how things are going. To spot what’s working. To gently tackle what’s not. And most importantly to look ahead, together.
Let’s explore what makes a performance appraisal actually useful and human.
Why Traditional Appraisals Fall Short
Too often, appraisals are:
Infrequent (only once a year far too late to be helpful)
One-sided (manager talks, staff member nods)
Overloaded with formality and forms
Used as a dumping ground for feedback that hasn’t been shared earlier
And worst of all? They’re full of surprises.
People hear for the first time that they’ve “not been showing initiative” or “missed expectations” when no one mentioned it months ago, when it could have made a difference.
That creates anxiety, damages trust, and makes development feel like punishment, not support.
What a Good Appraisal Should Be
Let’s reframe things. A meaningful appraisal is:
A pause, not a verdict.
A conversation, not a report card.
A step forward, not a dressing down.
And above all, it’s a place where no one hears anything for the first time.
Here’s what that looks like in practice.
1. The Ongoing Conversation Principle
A great appraisal is never the first time something is said.
If someone is underperforming, they should already know and be getting support. If someone is thriving, that should have been recognised before now. Feedback should be shared little and often, not saved up for the big annual chat.
Tip: Use monthly 1:1s to share feedback early and kindly. That way, the appraisal becomes a summary, not a surprise.
2. Joint Preparation and Clarity
Both the manager and the team member should prepare and know what to expect.
Share a clear structure and reflection prompts ahead of time. For example:
What achievements are you proud of?
What’s felt tough or frustrating?
What do you want more of or less of at work?
How supported do you feel right now?
No one should walk in wondering, “What are we even going to talk about?”
3. A Human Tone from the Start
Start the meeting by checking in:
“How are you feeling about today’s chat?”
This opens the door for honesty and signals that this is a safe space, not an interrogation.
Even better? Agree the purpose of the meeting together. Something like:
“I’d love us to use this time to reflect on the last few months, spot what’s going well, and talk about where you want to grow.”
That’s a much better tone than:
“Let’s go through the form.”
4. Celebrating Strengths, Not Just Gaps
Many appraisals fixate on what’s wrong.
Flip that.
Start by asking:
What’s gone really well?
What strengths have you leaned into?
What energises you?
This builds confidence and engagement and reminds people of their value.
It also makes it easier to explore challenges later, because the conversation has already been grounded in trust.
5. Feedback That’s Honest and Kind
Feedback should always be specific, relevant, and shared with care.
Try:
“I noticed you handled that customer complaint with a calmness that really helped the situation.”
“The report was delayed a few times what support might help with timeframes next time?”
Notice what’s not there? Surprise. Blame. Generalised judgment. That’s intentional.
6. Two-Way Feedback is Essential
Ask:
“What’s helped you feel supported?”
“Is there anything I could do differently as your manager?”
“Have you felt able to raise concerns or ask for help this year?”
When feedback flows both ways, it strengthens the working relationship and surfaces things that need care.
7. Wellbeing Isn’t Off Limits
Real performance depends on wellbeing. Don’t ignore it.
Ask:
“How are you finding the balance at the moment?”
“What’s your energy been like at work lately?”
“Is anything draining or overwhelming you that we should talk about?”
This isn’t overstepping. It’s leadership.
8. Future-Focused, Not Just Past-Oriented
Yes, you need to talk about what’s happened but the real power is in what comes next.
Ask:
“What would you love to learn in the next 6 months?”
“Where do you see your next stretch or challenge?”
“What support would help that feel possible?”
This is the start of a coaching-style development conversation not just a yearly review.
9. Clear Agreements and Follow-Up
End with shared clarity.
Summarise what you’ve agreed, including:
Any goals or priorities
Support or resources needed
Wellbeing actions or adjustments
When you’ll check in again
And stick to it. Trust builds when words are followed by action.
10. Keep it Connected
Performance doesn’t happen in isolation.
It’s shaped by:
Culture and workload
Communication and expectations
Recognition and psychological safety
A good appraisal takes all of this into account. It doesn’t blame the individual for issues created by the system.
Positive Psychology Prompts for Meaningful Appraisals
Strengths and Successes
What has the person done well this year and what personal strengths were behind that success?
When did they feel most energised or “in flow” at work?
What have they contributed that might not be on paper but made a real difference to team culture or wellbeing?
What strengths have others noticed or praised them for?
When did they overcome a challenge in a way that reflects growth or resilience?
Reflection and Growth
What hasn’t gone so well, and what were the circumstances around it?
What did they learn about themselves through these experiences?
How did they respond to setbacks and what does that say about their mindset?
What patterns or habits would they like to shift in the coming year?
Is there a value or skill they feel they’ve underused, and want to bring forward?
Looking Ahead
What future opportunities would play to their strengths or stretch them in a meaningful way?
Where do they want to grow and how can you support that?
What would make their work feel more fulfilling, manageable, or motivating?
What kind of feedback or encouragement helps them thrive?
What do they want to feel proud of at this time next year?
Support and Commitment
What do they need more (or less) of from you as their manager?
What can you commit to doing more of, less of, or differently to help them succeed?
What would a truly supportive working relationship look like for the next 12 months?
Where might you adjust expectations, priorities, or workload to support their wellbeing?
How will you both keep this conversation going not just once a year?
The Golden Thread: No Surprises
Every person should leave a performance conversation thinking:
“That was honest, useful, and fair. And nothing caught me off guard.”
If something did surprise them, it’s a red flag for the manager. Not because they did something wrong but because something in the feedback loop didn’t work.
Maybe conversations haven’t been regular. Maybe expectations weren’t clear. Maybe feedback felt too risky to raise earlier. Whatever it is, that’s a sign to learn not to blame.
Final Thought
A good performance appraisal isn’t just about outcomes it’s about people. And people do their best work when they feel supported, respected, and part of something.
So let’s stop using appraisals to deliver surprises and start using them to build stronger relationships, clearer expectations, and healthier workplaces.
Because when people know where they stand and where they’re going, performance isn’t a problem. It’s a partnership.